Just another blog?

It is my fourth day of Industrial Attachment - just came back from lunch break! On top of this wonderfully horribly phase of depression that I am going through (I'd like to think it is a phase - its going to end rite?) I am in a research institute that is so not connected to my major beyond the fact that they both share a 'Bio' in their names.

The last time I was an 'academic' was in school when I thoroughly enjoyed the experience - the madness of knowledge, I used to call it. But, I have lost the touch to do any significant academic work. Definitely not if I dont have a passion for the subject matter.

Reading research papers seems a horrible way to spend time. So much that I am eagerly looking forward to the day when I will be asked to do a lab rat's work of filling thousands of cuvettes and taking readings (My friendly Belgian Ph.D. studying supervisor promises it will be early Feb).

So many things going in my head - so many scary thoughts and scary realisations. But, atleast most people here are decent. But, I am so self-obsessed right now, my social skills have taken a hit too!

Plus, the lack of coffee! After the doctor advised me to avoid that brown golden stuff for a couple of weeks, I have surprisingly managed to hold on to the challenge till now (my personal deadline - Friday). But, my brain tells me that a shot of coffee is likely to give me some cheer and improve my spirits. But, unfortunately I know thats not going to solve my problems. Not until my screwed up mental processes are fixed!